December 14, 2018

SATIRE: Alumni explain what the high school is all about

Some select alumni of the high school stopped by The Bradford to explain the true meaning of certain aspects of Wellesley, since they are experts.  These alumni had a lot to say about the workload and expectation of administration at the high school.  Whether you are a freshman with three more years to go, or a junior gearing up for you final year of high school, the advice that the alumni gave is invaluable.

First Day of School:

It’s back to school time! Finally! I’m sure that everyone has been counting down the days to being back in this building and immediately starting schoolwork again.   Be forewarned, any student who complains about the expectation to actually do work on the first day back will be given detention.  Because when you complain about school, they’ll just make you stay here longer.

Thanksgiving Pep Rally:

It is very crucial that all students wear their assigned class colors.  Seniors can wear their “Senior Men” or “Senior Women” shirts because after surviving these past three years, they deserve to show off personalized t-shirts with nicknames that they gave themselves.  Juniors should wear black to represent the dark and scary year ahead of them that is junior year.  Sophomores wear white or gray because sophomore year is the middle child of high school and this color illustrates the blank space that is open to opportunity for sophomores.  Finally, freshmen wear green because they are the grass that the rest of the school stomps on. It’s all for class spirit so make sure to come colorful and happy in an effort to forget all the work that was probably due that day.

Long Term Papers (Author Thesis/Junior Thesis/English IRP):

These papers are designed to take away what students thought were their Winter, February and Spring Breaks.  Yes, it is entirely possible to complete the papers on time without working during the breaks, but the true purpose of these papers is to teach students that when the administration says you are on break, you’re not actually on break.  Furthermore, the papers challenge students’ ability to function without the recommended 8-10 hours of sleep, especially in the week leading up to the due date. Wellesley High School is revered for its challenging aspects, so we are providing another way to challenge students.

Course Selections:

Honors means honors.  Don’t think that the teacher influences how much work is really involved in each class.  No matter who is teaching the course, if you take English 31, it will be very difficult and not at all dependent on whether or not you have certain teachers.  The same goes for ACP classes. They will always require less effort than an honors class.  Even if you struggle and are very diligent in your ACP classes, believe honors students when they say that they work harder than you.  No ACP class is difficult; you could honestly fall asleep and still get an A.

 (Natasha Ladhani ’16, Features Editor)

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